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By Andrew Crosthwaite
"We'll be right back after this break with more live spelling."
I dare anyone to switch stations after a sales-pitch like that. The "live" element was the clincher for me, no ordinary pre-recorded spelling bee, this one.
In case you're wondering, a thirteen-year-old with a fluffy brown moustache took first place. Traditionally not a great look for a girl, but with the thick-lensed glasses and immense spelling power, she made it work.
How can TV in this country be so consistently disappointing? During my three years in Taiwan, I've seen several positive changes and improvements, but not so with television. Have you noticed the Taiwan networks' peculiar obsession with Steven Seagal? Rarely a week passes without him gracing my screen at least once, and it's not unusual for two or three stations to vie for our affections with simultaneous Seagal screenplays. In each of them, he goes around looking like the big twat that he is, protecting a woman or some Native Americans from an evil company that pollutes the environment.
I know English is not the primary language in Taiwan, and I accept that, but I still can't help hating it when I put on the football game and hear two Taiwanese guys talking over the English commentary they can't even be bothered to mute out! It's like they're taunting me with a few English words here and there. They taunt me with Steve Irwin, too.
As irritating as talked-over football is, I prefer it to most of the crap ESPN airs. Its schedules are peppered with little treasures like live spelling bees and, my own personal favorite, the American Jump Rope Championship, full coverage.
If not for Donald Trump and "The Apprentice", I'd seriously consider switching-off and doing something interesting. |
